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Software developer at Grafana Labs working on Loki. Слава Україні! 🇪🇺 🇺🇦 🇦🇹

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$(curl -I -s https://haeussler.dev/bio | grep -i x-bio | cut -d' ' -f2-)

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Armchair rocket scientist graffiti existentialist. Old enough for it to hurt when I stand up, not old enough to have stopped noticing. Agnostic in principle, atheist in practice, #CSS guy, mzungu. I’m only here for the food.

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Accumulator of low activity social media accounts. Possibly finding new ways to finalize PHP libraries. Opinions, while my own, generally aren’t popular.

","updated":"2025-08-01 02:34:06.646Z","user":"","username":"Michael Babker"},{"collectionId":"pbc_1295301207","collectionName":"activitypub_actors","created":"2025-07-07 07:22:07.302Z","domain":"phpc.social","followerCount":4540,"followers":"https://phpc.social/users/ramsey/followers","following":"https://phpc.social/users/ramsey/following","followingCount":432,"icon":"https://media.phpc.social/accounts/avatars/000/000/001/original/f4012675b688d5fc.png","id":"66rm66a50f0e87u","inbox":"https://phpc.social/users/ramsey/inbox","iri":"https://phpc.social/users/ramsey","isLocal":false,"last_fetched":"2025-08-01 02:34:06.780Z","outbox":"https://phpc.social/users/ramsey/outbox","preferred_username":"ramsey","public_key":"-----BEGIN PUBLIC KEY-----\nMIIBIjANBgkqhkiG9w0BAQEFAAOCAQ8AMIIBCgKCAQEA0+ikrMWckMxDLeTgZ/0E\nYQM7OsMlVEPIhehWKD1TsjD6R4UTj71WKTH/voiSej/aFNmNus6UisqsC6ZPc9vZ\nFIvhc7AfUn6nvFVWP+HV/jsmzngqb6fapZhP/eCCnY4LOpdBak8ncKOdK5R20+Ij\niVj0CgzE0V41+Ei0neRB118fMKJBxBBQOvnwbn7J4E4HFwXraUo3BM+Bd8j07qiz\nwKPgEg/5ddeA9zn1SkCCBJRwD0DiQ5flGBdiSIjBk1N1cK+eoxrTPI8OEuMlpqtn\nsSJbiKJHbJBRslo2OTSqtt21Cn83iGBcc250I5NU4ZMco85t8LVnPe6ocmGGR5wC\nSQIDAQAB\n-----END PUBLIC KEY-----\n","published":"2018-08-14 00:00:00.000Z","summary":"

Coder, Author, & Speaker. PHP 8.1 & 8.2 RM. ramsey/uuid. Open Source. Staff+ Engineer. he/him

Co-admin of https://phpc.social

All original content in public posts © me & licensed CC BY-SA 4.0, unless otherwise specified. :cc: :ccby: :ccsa:

","updated":"2025-08-01 02:34:06.780Z","user":"","username":"Ben Ramsey"},{"collectionId":"pbc_1295301207","collectionName":"activitypub_actors","created":"2025-07-19 15:59:34.618Z","domain":"phpc.social","followerCount":73,"followers":"https://phpc.social/users/movetodevnull/followers","following":"https://phpc.social/users/movetodevnull/following","followingCount":27,"icon":"https://media.phpc.social/accounts/avatars/111/178/201/918/833/653/original/5f145efc531703a2.png","id":"sex9f895hc7el77","inbox":"https://phpc.social/users/movetodevnull/inbox","iri":"https://phpc.social/users/movetodevnull","isLocal":false,"last_fetched":"2025-08-01 02:34:06.840Z","outbox":"https://phpc.social/users/movetodevnull/outbox","preferred_username":"movetodevnull","public_key":"-----BEGIN PUBLIC KEY-----\nMIIBIjANBgkqhkiG9w0BAQEFAAOCAQ8AMIIBCgKCAQEAyAFu7futj9mobbwA3EIP\nthHR0VgVVK/iAkJ2yiOeXbJdh082P3lY1EeuU/kOb/6Od13k8uRp/IqVqcIQ9/Gv\nhnZKWayomXsapWJ4KdprPGTf2IxmqVcBrrdx0tl8AttWJAUq6mCO8QLGh1+4kGku\nTwoYkOPOc5OHF0GhIMsx2oxRIQy1cK2ZDkqXS78vulYGhH9e+DuAoamyyMcyBwjG\nBnOeKZ2m3DFfsWlSyirZNWaZo7tjTnvl/soqye0ijSACsIDfTmMyHfyO3y5C/UBo\nKmVmwd9o0i6gRBH6UnTMLFA78/4Gxab9BdDdpM2hjrhCyv8bUxzkysHUJMXW8qK5\nFQIDAQAB\n-----END PUBLIC KEY-----\n","published":"2023-10-04 00:00:00.000Z","summary":"

Everything is better with bacon and or unit tests.
Maintainer of CaptainHook 🏴‍☠️

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Freelance DevOps Engineer/Software Developer using #DevOps, #SRE, Cloud Native and #Kubernetes.

I’m working on something new called the Internet.

","updated":"2025-08-01 02:34:06.916Z","user":"","username":"Tom Keur"},{"collectionId":"pbc_1295301207","collectionName":"activitypub_actors","created":"2025-07-07 12:18:56.584Z","domain":"phpc.social","followerCount":1956,"followers":"https://phpc.social/users/Crell/followers","following":"https://phpc.social/users/Crell/following","followingCount":78,"icon":"https://media.phpc.social/accounts/avatars/000/000/948/original/b2c0fbf19043d758.jpg","id":"c8404l9n79k864d","inbox":"https://phpc.social/users/Crell/inbox","iri":"https://phpc.social/users/Crell","isLocal":false,"last_fetched":"2025-08-01 02:34:06.970Z","outbox":"https://phpc.social/users/Crell/outbox","preferred_username":"Crell","public_key":"-----BEGIN PUBLIC KEY-----\nMIIBIjANBgkqhkiG9w0BAQEFAAOCAQ8AMIIBCgKCAQEAppXITB5pNVJZe1TYM2LI\n951cQ8lWgNVkwH6T2iuU6dSAjKKzkuhiGNhotR6HKIips5N40U+vjDLz7r3BLJFB\nIwMdd5nfQ7O/UZtN3LARhwxQ948SjLdFU/sSdp+Zw3VG8gFEUswnNFK+g316VL7Z\n6vtDmZS+tYUv3VNSVdHq5yO/SQ/uJ9jHaE3Hte7dxr6viXk+5TBIoVlGkJYnemYZ\naQW54vT63aLDtAXZHQNwyXsir7eiZQSIF2I06PYuRmGSrf1q9GshIFtBLIE/Prv2\nh1DtsWbuEGl0k7Olz9L0pSpFjJem1yQXadJBdM0f8B4IV8+fcMNJIXF4Du0bu3K3\nEQIDAQAB\n-----END PUBLIC KEY-----\n","published":"2018-08-17 00:00:00.000Z","summary":"

Anything worth doing is worth doing well.

Anything worth doing well is worth teaching others to do well.

Author of Thinking Functionally in PHP, now on LeanPub: https://leanpub.com/thinking-functionally-in-php

#tootfinder

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","updated":"2025-08-01 02:34:07.165Z","user":"","username":"Lars Moelleken :verified:"},{"collectionId":"pbc_1295301207","collectionName":"activitypub_actors","created":"2025-07-07 17:25:20.055Z","domain":"webperf.social","followerCount":817,"followers":"https://webperf.social/users/csswizardry/followers","following":"https://webperf.social/users/csswizardry/following","followingCount":46,"icon":"https://cdn.masto.host/webperfsocial/accounts/avatars/110/650/946/782/403/776/original/401f22cc5ae3c784.jpg","id":"8n7268634hux370","inbox":"https://webperf.social/users/csswizardry/inbox","iri":"https://webperf.social/users/csswizardry","isLocal":false,"last_fetched":"2025-07-14 15:10:27.799Z","outbox":"https://webperf.social/users/csswizardry/outbox","preferred_username":"csswizardry","public_key":"-----BEGIN PUBLIC KEY-----\nMIIBIjANBgkqhkiG9w0BAQEFAAOCAQ8AMIIBCgKCAQEAvHZLmc1mS1bEW59VPlks\n81wxKlNAWUxxz8wKBIp1YvW9CSjOEBVcv4QUZfHpqBx0jtTxGpLeaWh3bqNICVQ9\nRZ/qDl8oRfyfV+TdRI3oIWO7wMF+f+8HoBwmuG2411YZc8aVaEKrJVtjcdTpHM5y\nT2uW+6NmH1ayahrsNI3/c/hlRrSIbcFL8ZkBbXKq+JIENkmARbuTrEs2w8jrlwhe\n3madWg8PsTERuOSFzOZ1CsGMCodrv2Y8zyULDimSPCwjjHoNtUGsUGCa1h2NhmG7\nyH/m4DxqXFKVBZ3nCVF6O5OQ3MEdNFFmMcpZD7iZr7hhoUo11bX3NDumrYpjG3jU\nrQIDAQAB\n-----END PUBLIC KEY-----\n","published":"2023-07-03 00:00:00.000Z","summary":"

Consultant Web Performance Engineer: Google, United Nations, Etsy, Kickstarter, BBC, Unilever, Deloitte, and more • Writer • Speaker

","updated":"2025-07-14 15:10:27.800Z","user":"","username":"Harry Roberts"},{"collectionId":"pbc_1295301207","collectionName":"activitypub_actors","created":"2025-08-01 02:34:07.285Z","domain":"mas.to","followerCount":0,"followers":"https://mas.to/users/mwidmann/followers","following":"https://mas.to/users/mwidmann/following","followingCount":0,"icon":"https://media.mas.to/accounts/avatars/109/363/816/509/230/373/original/2c03c99a53693d67.jpg","id":"263jw8d2ipd7826","inbox":"https://mas.to/users/mwidmann/inbox","iri":"https://mas.to/users/mwidmann","isLocal":false,"last_fetched":"2025-08-01 02:34:07.285Z","outbox":"https://mas.to/users/mwidmann/outbox","preferred_username":"mwidmann","public_key":"-----BEGIN PUBLIC KEY-----\nMIIBIjANBgkqhkiG9w0BAQEFAAOCAQ8AMIIBCgKCAQEAueosEgntbY6km2l9z3+Z\nhHvgeZ9ASBlDkKVxz+kMRNKMUEcIgZ7LbuFtzYNOwa+fDiDs1UDDwM9HSONsLudP\nK5KJJ7vVOqufosiTcdmZUXxvF19TmeQsD9J5U75QYWQ8VluRJchwRhY9FttQpGmt\ncnTYD96dXPdbYIAVk2uH12BxOqtXJiaD0f7DXLiGA+u6YfkCRT/lyspIHJSNphRp\nuIrpW0JhA3txp+rrbmIxQTgQSvWSCs8y9KvHzYN9ZnXrqtMJf4q1TuZbCwXMZj6V\nzJmRnuR+TXQiJfc9NYqUSSIkpscBTkL71lIRYKCgo+1Jor0wPT6u9YNN02pIf1WX\nzwIDAQAB\n-----END PUBLIC KEY-----\n","published":"2022-11-18 00:00:00.000Z","summary":"

Señor Developer, video gamer, SingStar, Italiani all'estero club member.

","updated":"2025-08-01 02:34:07.285Z","user":"","username":"Martin Widmann ❤"}],"page":1,"perPage":10,"totalItems":41,"totalPages":5}

Alexander Schranz

Following